tremors

i didn't feel anything at all.. earthquake? but i followed and left the building just the same..

as of now.. there are still so many people downstairs.. outside.. i've never seen cyberia so full of people before.. wish i had a camera..

just sitting here.. i'm thinking..

sadistically.. i wished the walls would collapse around me..
it would be like a way out.. the easy way to escape all this chaos.
then i wouldn't have to think anymore
i wouldn't have to work through all this on my own anymore..
no more quiz! no more submissions!
i'll be in a place where i feel no pain..
where i won't be hurt anymore..
where i won't see you anymore..
and it wouldn't matter at all.

but then..
what about saving the world for Jesus?
what about going to the ends of the earth for Him?
what about watching revival sweep across my land..?
what about my dream to see His glory fall?
what about all that He has planned for me to do?
what about life...

no..
no..
it's not my time yet..
not just yet..

silence once again..
sanity is maintained..
and the walls.. these walls..
they still stand..
yeap..
they very much are..