today


today i came to terms that almost everything around me hates me. either that, or all of them are pms-ing..
today i'm finally using my new pc! yay! (minus the dvd drive and the monitor) thanks david for the monitor and weeliem for the cd drive.. for now.
today is not my birthday, but i got bullied by a maniac with shaving cream
today i slept till 12:30
today i learned how to prophesy. heh. :D
today i crumpled..
today i cooked!! nothing fancy. cheapo stuff.. but it's been a while since i did any cooking.
today i dropped my phone twice.. :((
today i tried but i failed.. miserably.
today i wished that i understood..
today i wanted to go home.. to go to timbua too..
today i held on to God
today i made the decision to die to myself again
today i prayed.. and He answered
today..
today is another day gone.. and will not return.
but
today is a day that didnt pass with regret.


and before i go... here's something for you..
thanks for caring, thanks for trying to be there.
sorry that i come. sorry that i'm silent.
and sorry.. sorry that i am unable to express just how i feel inside.
yes, i'm overwhelmed.
good or bad, you asked.
no.. no.. it's not joy.
it's just that sense of helpless-ness..
all of a sudden, it hits.
and you dont know what to do.
wave after wave just washes over.
and you dont know where to go.
and i fall on my knees
i cry for answers, for Papa to show me the way..
and i cry.


i am silenced.
i am unable to put feelings to words.
i hate to explain.
you don't know me
nobody knows me
thanks for asking. thanks for trying.
and thanks..
thanks for cheering me up.
i'll miss you.
yes. i will.